On This Day in 1985 William Clinton Culpepper

William Clinton CulpepperOn This Day, September 14, 1985, William Clinton Culpepper died.

Uncle Clinton, as he was known to me, was my great uncle, brother of my grandfather. He lived next door to my grandparents and I have many fond memories of his kindness and love and especially his hugs.

 

culpepper Sam and Annie CulpepperClinton was born in Kemper County, MS on May 11, 1900 to William Samuel Culpepper and Annie Josephine Blanks (photo). He was the eldest of nine children totaling five boys and four girls. His father was a sawyer who followed the saw mill business, gone from home for great lengths of time, so the boys were taught to run the farm when their father was away. I imagine, being the eldest child, most of the responsibility fell to Clinton.

In 1922, when Clinton was 22, he married Miss Eloise Snowden. Following the birth of their two daughters, Eloise came down with breast cancer. For a man who was used to running the family, Clinton took the illness terribly. He put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger. Eloise survived the illness and Clinton survived the gunshot wound, but he now had a severely reduced mental capacity, and their marriage couldn’t stand the strain. They divorced.

William Clinton Culpepper and Thelma Smith CulpepperIn 1945, Clinton found love for the second time and married Miss Thelma Edna Annie Smith (photo). Again disaster struck. Thelma was diagnosed with breast cancer. Again Clinton put a gun to his head. Again they both survived the disasters. Thelma took care of Clinton for the rest of her life. She died 9 May 1984. Clinton died a year later 14 Sept 1985.

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They are both buried near Thelma’s parents in Mt. Pleasant Cemetery in DeKalb, Kemper County, MS.

Rest in peace, Uncle Clinton. ♥

 

This post is brought to you by On This Day: A Perpetual Calendar for Family Genealogy.

 

The Right to Free Speech vs. the Right to Not be Offended

The Right to Free Speech vs. the Right to Not be Offended

First… The right to free speech is a constitution right. The right to not be offended does not exist. There are limits to free speech such as lies (yelling “fire” when there is none), derogatory statements about race or gender (which can be construed as hate speech), using obscenities on the radio and tv, and a few more you can look up yourself.

Being an author, a blogger, and an artist, I’m strongly attached to this issue. There is an important discussion going on in this country regarding our right to free speech, and many organizations are circling the wagons, but there seems to be some major confusion between “recognizing bad taste” and “being deeply offended.” There was recently an incident of a satirist being accused of sexual harassment  over a college newspaper article published on April Fool’s Day that stated a new college building was being constructed in the shape of a vagina. The charges were brought about by one person, the Coordinator of Women’s and Gender Studies, because she was offended. Apparently, she was also ignorant that it was April Fool’s Day and does not recognize satire. Maybe the article was in bad taste, maybe not. I didn’t read it. But being offended by a satirical piece is a choice, keeping in mine that satire is supposed to be offensive. That’s the whole point. When did America become a place where we have to edit everything we say and write so as to not offend anyone? By the way, that’s impossible. I eat meat. The vegans are livid. I don’t drink coffee. Starbucks just lost their minds.

There is no constitutional right to not be offended. Being a blonde, female, mother, I could be offended by dumb-blonde comments. I could be offended by bad women driver posts. I could be offended by Yo Momma jokes. Being a survivor of abuse, I could be offended by people sticking up for the perpetrator in the recent Duggar scandal, but it’s a waste of my time and energy to allow myself to be offended by someone’s opinion. Some topics such as race, politics, religion, etc. run deeper than hair color or driving habits, but it’s still a waste of your time to be offended by someone’s comment, article, blog, joke, satire, or Facebook post. You have to learn to recognize the difference between opinions, trolls, ignorance, hate speech, and plain ole bad taste.

The silent majority

On the side of simply having a difference of opinion, how many of us remain silent in the face of ignorance or bad taste because we know we’ll be pummeled by nasty remarks from the other side. Are we intentionally and willingly giving up our right to free speech out of fear? What are we afraid of? I’ll tell you what we’re afraid of—there is no longer civil conversation in this country, no debate, no respect. Our problem isn’t speech, it’s lack of respect. How far can disagreements spiral downwards? Arguments, throwing fists, death threats? Why can’t we listen? Why can’t we agree to disagree?

Two distinct issues

I think there are two distinct issues here. The first is the illusion that you have a right to not be offended. There is no such right. If you’re offended, it’s your choice. I play an adult burlesque-ish dueling piano show. I always tell my audience that our job is to offend everyone throughout the night and if they haven’t been properly offended by the end of the show, come talk to one of us in person and we’ll be happy to offend them face-to-face. I’ve never had anyone leave the show or talk to us afterwards. They laugh. They don’t take offense. It’s their choice.

The second issue is the lack of respectful discussion in our culture. Many would rather be right than be nice, and many of us would rather unfriend you than offer our opinions and spark your rage. Is that a problem of lack of respect or of fear or both? Do I allow my fear of your anger to squash my right to free speech? Is it okay that I give you that power? Does your lack of respect give you more rights than me?

Solution

The same answer applies to both issues…be respectful.

From a communication standpoint: Speak, write, show the slightest bit of taste and respect in your ideas. There is a difference between trying to instigate anger and insulting people when they disagree and creating a thoughtful open dialog with respectful and honest communication.

From a receptive standpoint: Be open to other’s thoughts; perhaps you can learn something. Stop labeling and judging, and certainly don’t slam people when they represent an alternative idea. When did we start labeling groups with the sole intent on squashing them? When did our culture shift from meaningful debate to us vs. them? There is no us or them, and we are all members of the same group…human.

52 Ancestors #21 Sharpshooters and Soldiers

52ancestors-2015

This challenge is set forth by No Story Too Small,

and this week’s challenge is “Military.”

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I can’t only honor one of my ancestors. I need to honor all of them.

My grandfathers who served in the United States military

An * denotes he died in service.

Joel Bluett Culpepper – Confederate Army

William Thomas Fisher – Confederate Army

William Lafayette Brown Jr – Confederate Army

Rev. Joseph M Culpepper – Confederate Army *

Rice Benjamin Carpenter – Confederate Army *

George Washington Spencer – Confederate Army

James C Howington – Confederate Army

William Henry Blanks III – Confederate Army

Hays Rodgers – War of 1812

William Henry Blanks I – American Revolution

Joseph Culpepper Jr – American Revolution

Thomas Young – American Revolution

John B Rice – American Revolution

James Rodgers Sr – American Revolution

Captain Jacob Prickett – American Revolution

My uncles who served in the United States military

George M Graham – Confederate Army

Timothy Rodgers – Confederate Army *

Wilson Rodgers – Confederate Army *

Hays Rodgers Jr – Confederate Army

John W Rodgers – Confederate Army *

Howell Joel “Hobby” Wedgeworth – Confederate Army

Benjamin M Culpepper – Confederate Army

Hilliard Carpenter – Confederate Army *

James Monroe Chatham – Confederate Army *

Rev. James Lafayette Blanks – Confederate Army

Richard Lane Blanks – Confederate Army

John Henry Brown – Confederate Army

Absolom Rodgers – War of 1812

…and so very many more. Sleep well, soldiers. Your job is done.

52 Ancestors #13 Ina Inez Burke Culpepper

52ancestors-2015

This challenge is set forth by No Story Too Small, and this week’s theme is “different.”

My grandmother died March 1, 1975

Meridian Star

March 4, 1975 

Mrs. Ina Culpepper

Services for Mrs. Ina Inez Culpepper, 60, were to be held at 10 a.m. today at Stephens Funeral Home Chapel, Revs. Roger Leggert and Charles Davis officiating. Burial was to be in Liberty Cemetery, Newton County.

Mrs. Culpepper died Saturday in a Meridian hospital. She was a member of First Pentecostal Holiness Church.

Survivors include her husband, Earl W. Culpepper, Meridian; two daughters, Mrs. Bobbie McQueen, Meehan, Mrs. Linda Hegwood, Utica, Mich.; two sisters, Mrs. Ellen Scarbrough, Houston, Tex., Mrs. Myrnis Howard, Meridian; three brothers, Willam Otho Burke, James Otis Burke, and E. O. Burke, all of Duffee, and four grandchildren. 

 

Mamaw and Papaw with grandkidsIna was my maternal grandmother. She was born in 1915 to Mary Elizabeth Howington and John Patrick “Pat” Burke. Her Howington side was English and Choctaw Indian. Her Burke side was English and Irish. She was the eldest, with four little brothers and two little sisters. One of the boys died as an infant, but the rest of her siblings outlived her and are listed in her obituary. Her mother also outlived her by two years, but for some reason, is not listed.

At the age of 21 in 1936, Ina married Earl Culpepper and had two daughters, one in 1938 and one in 1944. She worked as a seamstress at Burnley Shirt Factory in Meridian, MS and could sew anything just by looking at it in the store for a few minutes. She was a fabulous cook, a quiet woman, and she loved her four grandchildren. The little girl in the photo is me. 🙂

We always celebrated her birthday on February 9. Her tombstone says February 9. Her death certificate says February 9.

Her birth certificate says February 8. It was signed on February 8. It was filed in the state of MS on February 8.

burke Ina Inez Burke headstone

OKATIBBEE CREEK on Amazon

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR COPY OF OKATIBBEE CREEK …and don’t forget the tissue.

okatibbee creek cover front JPEGIn the bloodiest years of our nation’s history, a young mother was left alone to endure the ravages of the Civil War and a typhoid epidemic that threatened the lives of everyone left behind.

Okatibbee Creek is based on the true story of Mary Ann Rodgers, who survived the collapse of the Confederate dollar, food shortages, and the deaths of countless family members to war and disease. As she searched for a way to feed her children and her orphaned nieces and nephews, Sherman’s Union army marched through Mississippi on their way to destroy Meridian, and Mary Ann found the distant war literally on her doorstep. Help arrived just in the nick of time in the form of an unexpected champion, and Mary Ann emerged on the other side a heroic woman with an amazing story.

Okatibbee Creek is a novel of historical fiction that brings the Deep South vividly to life and will have you cheering and crying through a real-life story of loss, love and survival.

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR COPY OF OKATIBBEE CREEK

Saturday Snippet – Savannah’s Bluebird

bluebird_small webI released Savannah’s Bluebird a year ago. It stemmed from a vivid dream I had, and though it didn’t take me months and months of research as with my historical novels, it still holds a place in my heart. It’s the story of a man and woman who tried desperately to get married, but everything stood in the way of their wedding day – including death. I published it on February 11, 2014.

I dreamt it and wrote it in 2012, the month before we found out my future son-in-law had cancer. In late 2013, I finally dug it out of the archives and finished writing it. My boy was getting worse by the day and the wedding was canceled only a week before it was to occur. The day after I published Savannah, I received a call from my daughter that our boy had been admitted to the hospital. Within days, he was placed in hospice, and he took his last breath on February 24, 2014. I always read my books after they’re released, but my heart is still broken, and I can’t bring myself to read this one. It’s a little too close to home, but there’s a reason I wrote it and a reason it’s out there in the world. Perhaps someday, I’ll find out what that reason is. Here is a snippet of Savannah’s Bluebird where Savannah is having a flashback to her childhood.

Dedicated to my beautiful son

Trien Duong

June 15, 1981 – February 24, 2014

You will always be the brightest star in our sky

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August teased her. “If you remember correctly, I asked you to marry me twenty years ago under your dad’s apple tree.”

She sighed, closed her eyes in front of the foggy mirror, and absentmindedly began brushing her teeth. She could picture that big old apple tree like it was right in front of her. The branches spread out across the sky like an enormous umbrella shading the picnic table beneath it. At the end of a good summer, so many apples would be on the tree, the branches would almost touch the ground, burdened by the weight. The old paint-peeled table beneath the tree was a favorite place for the squirrels to sit and eat the apples, leaving half-eaten cores when they scampered off. August and Savannah spent many, many afternoons talking and playing and telling childhood secrets under that tree.

In the warmth of the late fall afternoon, Savannah sat alone at the picnic table with an array of colored silk threads spread out in front of her. The leaves had fallen a few weeks ago, leaving only a few stray apples on the ends of the branches. The sun shone through the branches, warming her hands, and the sweet smell of decaying apples and the crisp smell of dying leaves surrounded her, making her head swim with happiness. Fall was her favorite time of year. She stared at the woven fabric she was embroidering and sorted through the colored threads on the table.

An ocean inlet ran along the back of the property, and she could faintly hear the soft babble of the water splashing on the rocks, as well as the buzz of dragonflies and katydids. August appeared out of the dying brush that was only a few weeks ago thick summer bushes. He was wearing a brown button-up shirt, suspenders, and dirty trousers darkened by wetness up to the knees. Obviously, he had been playing at the inlet, probably trying to catch frogs or crawdads. He ran over to the picnic table and plopped down across from her.

“Watcha doin’?” He was short-winded from running.

“I’m working on a pillow covering for home economics class,” she answered.

She picked up the fabric, turned it around, and held it up for his approval.

He wrinkled his forehead and said, “It looks like a bird. I thought you liked dogs.”

“I do like dogs, but Mrs. Thompson said we have to create something that flies.” She rolled her eyes and placed it back in front of her on the table.

“Well, why don’t you sew a spaceship with a robot or something?” he asked, wrinkling his forehead.

“Only boys would make spaceships and robots.” She scowled at him. “I want to make something else. My dad told me this story about a bluebird. He said a gypsy woman told him the bluebird represents love, and if you’re with someone you love and see a bluebird, you’ll be with that person forever.” She picked up the blue thread and attempted to thread her needle. “So, I’m embroidering a bluebird.”

“Was it one of those gypsies down on the beach?”

“No, he said it was a gypsy woman in New Orleans a long time ago—before I was even born. He was working on the railroad down there when he met my mother. He said the day after the gypsy told him that story, he and momma saw a bluebird. They were married a few days later.”

When August didn’t respond, she looked up at him—and froze. Right above his head, on the lowest branch of the tree, sat a little bluebird. It was bright blue on top with a reddish-brown throat, and it was no more than a foot from them. She didn’t move, half afraid of scaring it away and half amazed that their conversation had suddenly manifested itself. August turned to follow her gaze and froze also. Neither of them dared breathe as they watched the bird—and the bird watched them.

“Will you hand me that towel?” August asked.

Savannah didn’t respond.

“Savannah, hello? Will you please hand me that towel?” August asked again, snapping Savannah’s attention back to the present.

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Lori Crane Books at Amazon

Budget vs. Extra Bucks

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2015 is the year of getting out of debt, hence it’s the year of creating a budget and sticking to it. At the end of the budget, at the end of the year, there will be great freedom and rejoicing. Hosanna and Mazel Tov!

Day One:

I had a $20 budget to go to CVS and pick up three things. Not five things. Three Things. CVS is going to be the death of me. They offer “Extra Bucks” if you spend a certain amount on certain products. If you aren’t familiar with “Extra Bucks,” they are coupons you can use as cash on anything in the store. I go to CVS at least once a month, so I can always use those “Extra Bucks.”

My shopping list consisted of three things:

Lipstick – $10 with a coupon for 10% off = $9

Excedrin – $10 with a coupon for $1.50 = $8.50

Conditioner – $2.99 but on sale for $1.99

So, my total would be $19.49.

This shopping trip would be a piece of cake. I would plop my $20 bill on the counter and get change back. Perfect! On budget! Pride exuding through my pores as if I’d just climbed to the peak of the financial summit!

article-2179504-143EA986000005DC-698_964x640Here’s what really happened…

The lipstick had a special. “Spend $15, get $5 in Extra Bucks”

The Excedrin had a special. “Spend $25, get $10 in Extra Bucks”

I could buy two tubes of lipstick which I will certainly use, and I could buy Excedrin in the $10 size and the $15 size to make $25. And who wouldn’t want “Extra Bucks?” I have no control. My budget wasn’t foremost in my mind. I was tempted by how much I would save, and I was led willingly and joyfully into the pit of the serpent.

IMG_20150114_091403752I bought:

Two lipsticks for $18 after my 10% coupon

A year’s worth of Excedrin for $23.50 after my $1.50 coupon

Conditioner for $1.99 on sale

Total cost $42.49

I got $15 Extra Bucks to spend at a later date, and the way I see it, I don’t have to spend $20 on lipstick and Excedrin anytime in the near future.

If you take the $42 I spent minus the $35 I won’t have to spend in the future, that means my $20-budgeted shopping trip only cost me $7. Right? Then how did I spend $22 more than I had planned to?

Trophy husband says you can’t look at sales when you’re on a budget. You have to stick to the budget. The sales will still be there when you’ve reached your financial goal, but for now, ignore them. I told him I can’t do that. I’m a woman and it’s in my DNA to take advantage of a good sale.

Ugh. This had been so traumatic, I actually wrote a blog about it. Somebody tell me how to do this. I have a sneaking suspicion that trophy husband is right. There can be no wheeling and dealing when the budget says what the budget says. Stick to the budget like it’s the law. Am I right? Has anyone out there done this before?

It’s Monday! What are you reading?

2a2It’s Monday! What are you reading?

This book is part of my New Year’s resolution. I don’t know if it will happen, for I’ve retired from the music business on two occasions thus far and always get sucked back in, but I’m looking to retire again within the next few years. Even if I don’t end up retiring, I still want to be in a good financial place so it’s my choice. I need to get caught up from moving out of state back in May, which consisted of using my credit card to purchase new appliances for my new house. Somehow, I figured it would be cheaper to buy new stuff than to pay movers to ship old stuff. When I say old, I mean ancient. I could have sold them as antiques. On top of that bill, I still carry some debt from my son’s college education. I’d also like to get my car paid off. For 2015, my resolution is to make this happen. Like most people, I always have the best of intentions to save, invest, pay off bills, etc., but as with most things in life, if you don’t stay motivated, you won’t get things done. So, during 2015, I vowed to keep myself motivated by purchasing a financial/investment book on the first of each month. I spent the first six days of January browsing Amazon and searching for something I found interesting. On the seventh day, I found it! I’ve listened to his radio show on occasion and was always interested in his financial process, but I’ve never taken the next step to engage myself in his philosophies. Well, I jumped aboard his ship and I am intrigued. The book is “The Total Money Makeover” by Dave Ramsey.

51g2DdD31VLI’m going to say two things about this book. 1) I wish I had read it when I was younger. 2) I’m buying the book for my kids.

The process is logical, it’s genius, it’s how our grandparents lived before culture brainwashed us to live beyond our means and on credit. If we hear long enough and loud enough that living on credit is a good thing, eventually we start to believe it. It’s a lie! I’ve always had a good credit score, but my goal now is to have a ZERO credit score. You’ll have to read the book to understand that. 🙂  You don’t need to be “credit worthy” if you have CASH!

This is not an easy financial program. In fact, it’s a bitch. It requires sacrifice and focus and motivation, but, in Dave’s words, “If you will live like no one else, later you can live like no one else.”

Dave Ramsey’s website – click here.

 

It’s Monday! What are you reading?

2a2It’s Monday! What are you reading? Yes, I know it’s Tuesday. Yes, I know this is a day late. Thanks for catching that and letting me know. 🙂

This week I read a book called

“Love Well: Living Life Unrehearsed and Unstuck”

by Jamie George.

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I’ve heard Jamie speak many times as he is the pastor at a church near my house, and I attend his Sunday services when I’m in town. The man can tell a good story. He brings Bible stories to life as I’ve never heard before, and he often has brilliant insights on life and love, so I was so excited to read his new book.

If you are in need of a new way to frame your thinking, or in a rocky relationship, or simply looking for ways to improve your life, you will love this book. I’ve been exposed to “New Thought” ideas for a long, long time, so I didn’t find anything particularly mind-blowing in this book, but there were a few things that struck me and stuck with me.

One thing he said, and I’m paraphrasing, was that if you ask someone to tell you their story, beginning with a moment in their life that radically changed their path, you will always hear a moment of light, of awe, of wonder. No matter how horrid or sad or tragic their story begins, they will always mention that flash of redemption – the moment they realized their bad situation created a positive result they never expected and certainly didn’t see at the time. I’ve been experimenting on friends and family without their knowledge. Yes, no matter what their story, it always has a bright light at the end. They say things like, “But if it wasn’t for that, I wouldn’t be where I am today.” Let them talk and wait for it. It always comes. Wow! If nothing else, it’s good to know that things usual turn out for the best, and if this is so, we can relax, knowing we will see the redemption in our situation eventually. Just realizing that takes the stress level down a notch.

I adore Jamie George. Check him out.

Jamie’s website – click here.

Journey Church Franklin – click here – where you can listen to Jamie’s podcasts.

Amazon link – click here.

On This Day in 1893

On This Day in 1893, Mary Elizabeth Howington was born to John Thomas Howington and Florence J Smith in Mississippi. She was the first born to the union, followed by three sisters and four brothers.

burke JP and Mary howingtonShe and her younger sister Julia married Burke brothers, both in November 1912. Mary Elizabeth was 18 and married John Patrick “Pat” Burke and had seven children. Julia was 16 and married David Edmund Burke and had eight children. (photo is Pat and Mary)

john thomas howington florence j smith marriage recordThere have been family stories of one of my grandmothers being a full-blooded Choctaw Indian. In all of my research, I could never find any records for Mary Elizabeth’s mother, Florence, other than her marriage record which states she was 16 years of age. I believe Florence Smith is the Choctaw Indian my family speaks of.

burke Mary Howington Burke headstoneMary Elizabeth remained in the small community of Newton County, Mississippi her entire life and died at the age of 83 on 7 July 1977. Her husband died in 1958. She never remarried. She is laid to rest at Liberty Baptist Church with her husband and children.

This post brought to you by On This Day.