Tag Archives: work

Pretty Sure I Was Abducted By Aliens

Posted on by Lori Crane

Day after day, every morning is the same routine.

After I get out of the shower, I wrap my hair in a towel. I apply deodorant and face lotion. I get dressed, dry my hair, plug in my curling iron, apply my makeup while it’s getting hot, then curl my hair and add earrings. Aaannnd, I’m off! Twenty minutes, tops.

Here’s what happened this morning!

I did all the above, just as I always do it, in the same order, without waiver, just like every other day!

I went to work and caught up on a couple hours worth of items leftover from yesterday. I then joined a conference call that spanned a dozen people over five states. If you’re not familiar with WebX, someone on the call will be the presenter and share their computer screen with everyone else.

During this time, I realized I had been so busy all morning, I had neglected to use the restroom. You know, if you get stuck in a situation where you can’t go to the bathroom, it makes you have to go all the more! Well, I was the presenter in this WebX conference and couldn’t leave – not even for a minute! And this was a TWO HOUR presentation.

FINALLY, we ended the call and I sprinted to the restroom.

Upon washing my hands in front of the mirror, I looked up, and to my horror, I saw my pale, bare, makeup-less face. Nope, not one little swipe of blush. No eyeliner. No mascara. No lipstick. What the H E double L was going on here???

My hair was curled. My earrings were on. Did I not look into the mirror this morning to do those things? Where I would have seen my makeup’ed face? And certainly noticed the lack of said makeup?

Wait! If my hair was curled, what was I doing for the five minutes it took for my curling iron to warm up??

I can’t figure this out.

I came out of the restroom and told my co-worker, “I forgot to put on eyeliner this morning.”

To which she replied, “Yes, I noticed that right away.”

“WHAT?! And you didn’t say anything???” (May be on the hunt for some new coworkers.)

The only explanation I can figure is I was abducted by aliens this morning for about five minutes.

Either that, or I’ve lost my ever-lovin’ mind, and I refuse to believe that is true.

alien

Happy New Year, I’m baaaack!

Posted on by Lori Crane

Hello 2014! It’s so nice to see you.

1469780_10152023739203326_873291096_nI have to admit the year has been more than screwy so far. I was working on a ship out of New York the whole month of December, and on January 5th, I tried to board my hour-long flight from New York to Detroit to get home…but…2 cancellations, 3 delays, 1 missed flight, 3 states, 42 hours, and a partridge in a pear tree later, I finally arrived. Yes, I’m complaining, but not as hard as the folks I spoke with on Monday night in Minneapolis (don’t ask me how I got there) who were trying to get home to Toronto since Thursday. I hope everyone finally made it to their destination and is recovering from the experience. P.S. I’m still searching for my luggage. 😛

1479265_10152062245918326_674580956_nThe most exciting part of the trip was a medical emergency on the ship in the middle of the Atlantic, which caused the Coast Guard to fly out and airlift someone. If you look under the helicopter in this photo, you’ll see the Coast Guard guy coming down onto the ship on a rope. Just another gig for these guys. They are amazing! I’ll tell you what though…they lifted the sick person into the helicopter, strapped on to a stretcher. If the person didn’t already have a heart attack, he probably did during that lift. Note: I spoke with a Coast Guard person while sitting in the airport (see above paragraph) and he said there is no cost for a person to be rescued at sea. Thank goodness. That would probably cause a heart attack also.

51QeOBe26zL._SL500_AA300_PIaudible,BottomRight,13,73_AA300_So, in December, my book Okatibbee Creek came out on audio. It’s available at Amazon, Audible, and iTunes. It was narrated by the amazing actress Margaret Lepera. If you’re not familiar with the story, it’s the life story of my third great grandmother, and hearing her voice come to life takes my breath away. You can listen to a sample clip at any of the above links. Check it out.

 

 

AOH%20cover_webAlso, my cover for An Orphan’s Heart, created by Elite Book Design, moved into the finals at AuthorsdB Book Cover Contest. It is in the Top 10 in the ‘Overall’ category. That’s like ‘Cover of the Year’ or something. The winners will be announce in February. Wish me luck!badge-finalist

bluebird_small webWhile I was away, I finished writing Savannah’s Bluebird, which is coming out in February, and I’m very excited about it. I had tea every Tuesday morning at Port Canaveral with the dolphins in the inlet. You can’t see them in the photo, but trust me, they’re there. I also partied for five weeks with the casts of Rock of Ages and Second City and am enamored by those awesomely talented people. It was a great trip. I’ll be sailing out of Miami to the Caribbean the month of March. I’m hoping for a better flight experience. 🙂940829_10152095248678326_1464106962_n

I may not post a lot this month as I’m opening a new dueling piano club in Grand Rapids, Michigan starting TONIGHT, then working in Milwaukee, Wisconsin for a couple weeks. I promise I’ll be back full time in February.

Stay warm! and I’ll talk to y’all soon. ♥